Right here, right now, I imagine you may be OK but not necessarily “happy”. If you are happy, that’s wonderful. The reality, however, is that, more often than not, we are OK and perhaps only one moment, one experience, away from “being” happy. To me, this is a good Life when “good” is good enough.
Unfortunately, the experiences that bring us happiness are fleeting and, sometimes simultaneously, celebrated with some degree of anxiety about what is next. This may be attributable to living during an era when we are constantly distracted and trying to keep up with the ever-faster pace of our lives. Being under this stress, we are challenged to being mindful enough to slow down and really enjoy experiences that makes us feel “being” happy.
Of course, not everyone is challenged in that way. For those who were left behind by a modern era, or those who choose not to try to keep up, daily life is likely to be less stressful. Regardless, “being” happy is still “being” happy while we are feeling happy. Just take a moment to “notice“ what you are feeling and sensing.
Your happiness belongs to you, and only you can experience it exactly the way you do. Only your sense of it matters — not mine or anyone else’s. No two people experience happiness the same way or for the same reasons. Fortunately, most of us have similar references and perspectives with respect to life and living that allow us to share and appreciate what we feel without a care for what happiness means, and that is a beautiful thing.
Talking about a beautiful thing; I recalled something that happened to me some time ago that captured my attention and motivated me to write about this topic. It made me realize that there are things I know and understand without consciously thinking about them. I’d like to share that story with you.
I used to be an avid golfer and, for years, my friends and I would golf at least once a week, most of the time at the same golf course. In golf lingo, Charlie, Pedro, Edgar and I were a “foursome”. It seemed we were all in the same stream of consciousness about golfing. We loved it! Just the phone calls with each other about what time (“Tee time”) we would play and on which golf course were filled with excitement and anticipation. We were similarly competitive and had handicaps ranging from 11 to 14. In other words, we usually scored under 90 which is much better than average, and in golf the better you played, the more you enjoyed the game. Getting together to golf was a ton of fun; the trash talking, horsing around and, of course, the wagering. Anyone of us could win any round (game) we golfed (played). But the target was usually on my back.
The Fontainebleau Golf Course no longer exists. But right next to the Tee box of the 13th hole on the west course was a trailer home. If you know Golf you know that silence is the Golden Rule when addressing the ball to take your shot. However, that rule did not apply to the folks in the trailer home. There was usually loud music, talking, laughing and dancing. It seemed there was always a party going on.
The first time we encountered these folks we were bothered by all the commotion and would stare them down. But they did not know the Golden Rule, nor did they appear to be interested in what we were doing. They were busy celebrating life, having fun and “being” HAPPY! Consequently, we were forced to focus more in order to block out the distraction and continue to play. Eventually, we became accustomed to the distraction and, ironically, became better and happier golfers. I can’t emphasize how happy I would “be” golfing with my buddies. Like I said before, it was a ton of fun.
Anyway, there we were, engaged in what many consider to be an elitist activity while the trailer home folks were engaged in celebrating the simplicity of the life they knew. They were being happy. We were being happy. Neither were happier than the other.
So, who is happier? No one is. I am only as happy as I am in the moment I am being happy. I can only be happier than the last time I felt happy. Either way, when I am feeling happy, I am mindful to simply “be” happy as I am and as everything and everyone is, without judging. I am reminded of the philosopher/singer Bobby McFerrin who sang, “Don’t Worry. Be Happy”. However, during these times when we have gone beyond “Hurry up and wait” to “Hurry up and what are you waiting for?”. I suggest we “slow down and taste Life, one sip at a time”. Incredibly, by doing so, the happy moments will seem to last longer. Steal a moment now and then, to simply “notice”.
Written by William Garcia,
Author and Life Coach
Photo by Anthony Tuil on Unsplash